Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Adventures in Necklaces


The first thing you should understand about Justice Hall's mom: she's 17 in this picture. When I was 17 I still hadn't learned how to look directly into the camera, and you better believe I wasn't bold enough to blow up and sex out my hair and be all "what?" But Mrs. Hall was born with style chutzpah. That's probably why she became a cosmetology teacher who taught hair stylists how to do what she was doing as a freaking teenager.

While you may not have the genes or the balls for the badass afro or the cold-as-ice stare, you could try for the late 60's/ early 70's pendant choker. I had quite an adventure searching for a similar look. The closest I found was this cameo pendant from the 1960's. It's no triangle, but the silllouette is kind of fabulous in a Martha Washington kind of way.


But before that happened, this hand happened. Can you do me a favor and click on the picture for the full detail? On a vintage jewelry site with some solid antique pieces, someone chose to use this corroded mannequin hand to stroke all the pieces on display. I'm considering calling the authorities.


Then I stumbled on this necklace model. Rather, porn. It's one of those sites where you can "zoom in" to get a better look at the necklace slash sun-burned nipples. Seriously? Did the owner of this site comb the Jersey Shore holding a rosarie? "Hey, this may sound weird, but will you come to my studio and stand in front of this white background? I just want to use your chest to model my beads." I also have real problem with the oiliness of this man's body. I hope he used Clearasil after this shoot because he's probably going to break out.

Moral of the story: googling "silver choker 1970's" should be rated NC-17.

2 comments:

Felix Curds said...

HAHAHA! YES!

Wooden Finger said...

Love it. And this necklace is is a similar vain too

http://cgi.ebay.com/VINT-STERLING-TAXCO-PRE-COLUMBIAN-SIGNED-ZQA-NECKLACE_W0QQitemZ360250997156QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item53e0a1f9a4